I had a meeting with my work bosses yesterday and finally I have a direction. It may not be a direction many would like, they may even fear and in truth I am rather fearful for sure! Now is the time my ‘new world’ will be waiting. Waiting for me to put in practice all or at least some of the things I have thought and said I would like or can possibly do. The final decision is out of my control and I have to wait for unknown persons to review me and decide. Decide what the basis of my life will be!!!! Please make it the best it can be in view of my circumstances whoever you are.
I am no longer to be employed in a role I have done for almost 15 years. I soon will not have an employer as such. It is so weird and I do not think I can take to in properly yet. I now have to wait to see if I can get the best deal from it all and that seems to be ill health early retirement. I am just (relative to some I realise) 53yrs old so I do at least, health limitations allowing, a chance to make something of myself. By that I mean make something I want to be and not what others expect and or need me to be. Oh and argh and eek! Even as I write, its starting to scare me just that little bit more.
On good days I feel I could rule the country but on bad days I couldn’t even squash a tomato or fight my way out of a paper bag lets be honest. There lies my problem, my ‘issues’ are so variable so this just adds a complexity I would rather not have but I do have it so, Anne ( yes I talk to myself ALL the time) you have to make some decisions, you need to earn money to be able to live. How the heck???!!!!
Life’s crossroads and choices, they define us as they will lead us onwards. Whether the path they take us down are right or wrong or will help or hinder us, that is what none of us know. All we can do is make the best of them and have the strength to alter then yet again if they end up not working out.
Well this seems to be a proper right on ramble from me. I have just let my mind and fingers (that are good today ~ yay, yippee!) type away in what I hope is not a load of nonsense but then if this is, thats my head so I have to accept this.
Ah yes, it seems my body is good today so maybe the opposite of that is that my mind is extra mush ~ ha ha ~ who knows? Only your comments will tell me that I guess. Of course if there are no comments then that also tells me something!!
Have a great day, evening or night guys and I will be back later or in the morning and at this moment I have no idea what I will publish but then…………maybe that curiosity helps? Not even checking what I have typed now as I know I will only go back change a lot or even worse case scenario not publish, so here goes…….I am about to hit that oh so scary PUBLISH button ~ ha ha ~ here goes 🙂